Six months ago today I lost my job. And it has been the most surreal, emotional and eye-opening experience in my life. It was such an odd feeling, to walk home that day knowing I wouldn't be going back the next, and not knowing what I was going to do. I really loved that job. Even though I had experienced my most challenging and frustrating moments working there, I had also experienced my most rewarding moments, and met some amazing people - both co-workers and customers.
So in the days following I had two overwhelming thoughts;
1. I had never been let go from a job before - I'm a failure.
2. I've always had a job, since I was 17 - I need to find another job ASAP!
I hit the ground running - re-vamped my resume, searched for jobs online, applying to anything that remotely related to my skills, and even flirted with the idea of starting my own business (which I think will always be in the back of my mind). After a few days of this, I decided it would be best for me to clear my mind, so I went to Port Alberni for a week. Part of me felt like I was running away from my problems, but the other part felt it would be a good way to hit the re-set button. I'm still not sure if it was either.
When I got back to Vancouver I decided I would take it day by day, and not stress out about it, and BOOM! I got an interview. Then I got another interview the next week. Then a couple more the next month. Then one in December and one in January. But all the while never hearing anything back from anyone, even after I followed up with them. Which was really strange to me for two reasons - because I have never interviewed and not gotten the job, and because I feel like it's common courtesy to get back to someone when they're waiting on your decision or they've reached out to you. Maybe its one of those big city things I'll never get used to - people feeling like their time is more valuable than yours. (Sorry, small rant.)
So that brings us to today. Besides a small stint at a clothing store for a few weeks around the holidays, which I'm not even counting as work since it was the most mind numbing experience of my life, I have been unemployed for 6 months. I have really tried to embrace this time, stay positive and to use it to really think about what I want my path in life to be.
I have never had a clear vision of what I want to do for a living, maybe because I haven't put much thought into it, maybe because I don't put much value on what someone does for a living (what you do is not who you are). All I know is it would be lovely to be able to spend my time doing something hands-on and creative, and I know I want to be living on the west coast. But the only thing I've always been 100% sure of was that I want to be a mum when I grow up. That's all. And I know that's not in the cards for the next few years, so I've been searching for something to do until then that won't just be a way to pass the time, if that makes sense. I do feel like something great is just around the corner, but I have no idea what that thing is.
A pleasant side effect of all this time on my hands, I have had plenty of time to try new recipes and have gotten really fast at crocheting - but more about that later.
ONE BIG CHANGE! That's still what I see for your future. Not sure how or when or why or what yet, but I see it as a positive thing in your life that this is all happening for a reason. You've certainly handled this situation with grace! I would have been a flustered mess! But through this change remember that we are all here to help in whatever way possible! We have this button on our instant message at work, that when someone has written something but there is no time to type or what have you, so you quickly click it. 'KEB: "Acknowledged" ', is what shows. I feel like its better then a "like" button it shows meaning and empathy almost. Anyways it's something I'm thinking of trying on this blog to show we, simply put, 'acknowledgement' of a post. So anyways I'll end with 'ACKNOWLEDGED'!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Kristine, I'm happy you see the situation that way. But remember the month of tears!? Ha! Thank goodness that hasn't reared it's ugly head again. I definitely feel more positive about the situation as time goes on, which is strange, because I feel like the normal reaction would to become more stressed and worried. I think it's important to wait for the right opportunity to come along, whatever that may be. It's definitely a time where we're able to make a big change in our lives, with Corey wanting to make a career change too. So who knows what will happen in the near future.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree, we need a way to show acknowledgement, because I know all of you ladies don't have as much time on your hands as I do to write wordy comments on every post. As far as I can see, there isn't anything I can program into the blog format, or way to mark things as read. And I don't know how often everyone is checking the blog. I'm checking it about once every two days. Any suggestions or feedback would be appreciated.
I remember going through all this with you! you have been so strong and confident all the while! I am so proud of you lysh! and you're right, what you do does NOT define someone at all, even though there is a stigma around that (lawyers… they must be boring and mean ;) But that's not the case at all!
ReplyDeletelike Kristine said, the next thing that comes along is going to be perfect for you! why else would God have you wait so long to find a job? He is having you wait an trust that the perfect job or "scenario" is right around the corner! You are a very talented person and you will be utilized to your full potential!
This Blog is the perfect outlet for talking through things that rest on your mind… we are all here to love and support each other! We are all with you lysh!